Restrain or React: Should Families Get Involved?
Failing a course, getting angered about a term paper grade or being upset with a BW policy-these stress-filled scenarios can lead to feelings of discouragement, disappointment and even disgruntlement for your student. It may be tempting to get involved, but should you?
With communication between family members being shared on a weekly if not daily basis, students straddle a relationship with both their families and college personnel.
At times, differing opinions, misunderstandings and frustrations can arise over grades, finance charges, registration issues, roommate disagreements or other facets of college life. As a caring family member, you may waver between wanting to help your student and trying to abstain so your student can learn to self-manage issues. How do you offer support while encouraging independence?
In truth, it is not always easy. Developing independence can be a learning experience for students and families alike as their relationship transforms throughout the college years.
Partners in Education
At BW, families are seen as partners in education who play an important role in the family-student-college relationship. Families are encouraged to regularly talk with their student about important issues. The following questions might help you decide what your level of involvement should be:
-
Am
I
concerned
about
a
safety
issue
that
could
affect
my
student
or
others?
-
Do
I
have
a
question
about
financial
aid
or
something
that
impacts
me
directly?
-
Has
my
student
talked
with
the
appropriate
BW
person
or
is
my
student
immediately
deferring
to
me
to
handle
it?
-
Could
my
student's
discouragement,
disappointment
or
disgruntlement
correspond
to
something
that
flared
up
quickly
but
will
be
forgotten
tomorrow?
-
In
talking
with
my
student,
do
I
feel
my
student
is
telling
me
everything
or
do
we
need
a
further
discussion?
-
Is
the
information
I
seek
protected
by
FERPA,
HIPAA
or
other
regulations?
If
so,
what
is
the
best
way
for
me
to
talk
with
my
student
about
this
topic?
-
How
can
I
best
support
my
student?
If
I
assist,
am
I
limiting
my
student's
ability
to
self-manage
a
situation?
If
I
say
nothing,
could
there
be
repercussions
my
student
might
be
unaware
of?
- Did I visit the BW website to see if the information I seek is posted there or if there are BW resources I can direct my student to?